Tag Archives: sensitivity

11 Signs You’re a Highly Sensitive Person

Has anyone ever told you that you’re sensitive or shy?  Do you have busy days and, by the end of the day, find yourself totally wiped out to the point that all you want to do is rest?

I know I totally relate.  And, fortunately, I’ve managed to learn how to care for myself a lot better all because I learned more about how to care for myself as a highly sensitive person (HSP).

Being a highly sensitive person is a totally normal trait.  In fact, somewhere between 15-20% of the population are highly sensitive.  Which, with those statistics, makes being a highly sensitive person totally normal, however, it’s still a small portion of the population.  As a result, many HSPs can feel alone and as if there are few people that can relate to their sensitivity.

Are you curious to see if you are a highly sensitive person? Here are 11 signs that you may be one:

#1 – You effortlessly pick up on other people’s emotions

Someone walks into a room and you get the sense that their stress, happy, upset, angry, worried, or whatever before you even talk to them.

#2 – You’re conscientious

You’re very in-tune with other people’s feelings and inner experiences so you want to act in a way that you perceive to be right for the environment.

#3 – You’re easily overwhelmed by sensory input

Loud noises, sirens, bright lights, strong flavors, coarse fabrics, strong smells, and chemicals bother you more than other people.

#4 – You avoid watching violent movies or TV shows

You avoid watching violent action or horror films or TV shows because can be too overwhelming for you.

#5 – You have a complex and rich inner life

You may not necessarily consider yourself to be an introvert, but you do have a complex and rich inner life.

#6 – When you were a child, others saw you as sensitive or shy

You were commonly labeled as “shy” or “sensitive” by parents, teachers, and peers.

#7 – You have a lower tolerance for pain than most people

While others may have a headache or feel sick and still be able to go to work, for you the pain is so much that you feel you have no choice but to stay home and rest.

#8 – You notice subtle change in your environment

For instance, you may a smell or sound that nobody else notices.  You may also notice that the food at a restaurant is not very fresh, while others may not notice at all.  You may also be able to sense when a person is on the verge of crying even though you’re not even looking at them or see them crying.

#9 – On busy days, you need your time to withdraw

Being constantly on the go doesn’t work well for you.  When you’re busy you need your time to withdraw from the world so you can recharge.

#10 – You get overwhelmed by other people’s emotions

Being around people who are stressed, anxious, angry, or upset can be overwhelming for you.

#11 – You’re bothered by harsh criticism more so than most people

You’re more easily hurt when someone is critical of you than most people are.

Take action now!

Do you relate to any of the traits listed above?  If so, share which traits you relate to in the comments below!

4 Ways to Cope When You’re Around Unhappy People

I’ve always been the kind of person who easily gets tuned into other people’s “vibes”.  What I mean by this is that I tend to pick up and easily recognize on the energy that they are putting out.  I’ll easily sense if others are happy, sad, stressed, pissed off, worried, or excited.  I also get a different kind of vibe if someone is being genuine or if they are trying to hide something.

We all do this to some degree.  Some may be just more sensitive to it than others or we may be more “in-tuned” in some moments and not so much in others.

In the midst of easily picking up on all these different vibes that others are giving off, it can be easy to get caught up in other people’s not-so-pleasant emotions.  If someone else is giving out vibes of being kind of crabby or unhappy we may start asking ourselves things like:

“Is there something that I did that hurt them?”

“Did I offend them somehow?”

“Does this person not like me for some reason?”

Sometimes in these moments these stressful or unhappy energies they are putting off can be so much that we may even want to spit out an “I’m sorry” even though we really have absolutely no idea what we are sorry for.  Other times we may simply just find ourselves overwhelmed or bothered and unsure as to what we need to do in order to “clear the air” when around such unhappy people.

In order to “clear the air”, here some are ways on how to properly cope when you’re around unhappy people:

#1 – Don’t take it personally.

The truth of the matter is, you are not nor have ever been responsible for this person’s happiness or anyone else’s other than your own.  We are the only person solely responsible for our own happiness.  Period.

Now, in the chance that you did, in fact, do something to offend or hurt this person then you can’t really apologize or change something if the person never told you.  That is their responsibility.  So until they say something to you, don’t sweat it.

#2 – Don’t get all caught up in their unhappiness.

Sometimes what we tend to do when we are around someone who is cranky and all unhappy is that we dwell on it.  We focus on their crankiness and then start complaining about their own negativity and unhappiness.

Doing this, however, is one of the worst things that we can do because we just keep the unhappiness going!  This is an unconscious habit that many of us easily fall into on a regular basis, so we need to really nip this habit in the butt pronto!  And so, in order to avoid getting all caught up in other people’s unhappiness…

#3 – Give yourself time to get re-centered regularly.

I also like to call this “giving yourself some me-time”.  When we are constantly on the go-go-go and never give ourselves some time to breath, we are not only more susceptible to getting stressed out but also more susceptible to letting other people’s “stuff” get to us.

So take some time every day to simply be alone with yourself.  During this time allow yourself to meditation, journal, reflect, read, exercise, or simply just do whatever you feel like in order to “recharge”.  Sometimes I do this through going for a walk and other times it may be through gardening.  Just go along with whatever you feel your heart is being drawn to!

#4 – Kill it with kindness.

How many times have you been having a bad day but upon crossing paths with a very happy and pleasant person you felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders?  I know I’ve had this happen!

The reality is that when we put out positive and pleasant vibes out to others by smiling, cheerfully asking someone how they are, or making some jokes we are actually helping others to raise their vibration to a more positive level as well.  The benefits are really two-fold: You brighten other people’s day and you brighten the day for yourself because you then experience gratification from helping others.

Now, of course, it isn’t all cranky-person proof.  Some people will just be stuck on being unhappy in that moment no matter what comes along.  However, it is still beneficial because it is helping you stay on the positive side of things rather than to get caught up in their negativity.

BrightenDay

Click to Tweet: If someone is unhappy & stressed know that YOU have the power to help brighten their day (AND yours)! via @jenilyn8705

Take action now!

Of the four tips listed above, which one do you most need to remember?  How are you going to start implementing this four tips starting today?  Share it in the comments below!

How to Be Happy When Other People are Draining You

I’ve always been a pretty sensitive person.

I’m one of those people where if someone I’m living with comes home upset or stressed I’ll know it the second they walk in the door — even if I never even saw them.  If the people I’m coming to visit are upset or depressed, I will know the second I walk in the door.  If someone around me expressing their stress verbally (even if it’s not at all directed at me), my body feels all shaken and it’s very challenging for me to focus on any task.

To top that off, with some people I can find myself so incredibly in-touch with their being, that I’ve found myself describing and explaining their emotions and experience as if it is my own.  As a result, I’ve really puzzled some friends through the years doing this cause they just couldn’t understand how on earth I could know so much about this other person’s experience without the person even openly sharing it with me.

Needless to say, being so sensitive isn’t a very easy thing to deal with.  In order to cope, it’s been a process of really learning how to set boundaries and put forth the effort to really focus on my own thoughts, feelings, and overall experience.

That was the ultimate problem after all — I was so in touch with other people’s stuff that I had absolutely no idea what my stuff was.  I was constantly blending in and getting really in-tune with others in order to best accommodate and make things better for them.

In that regard, it really is both a blessing and a curse.  It’s a blessing to know what people need in order to help support them and grow.  However, it’s a curse in that, in doing so, it’s a challenge to ever really know what one needs and truly take care of yourself.

And so, in the last few years my primary focus has been to focus on establishing boundaries in relationships and focusing primarily on my own experience.

This has worked fairly well, but the problem has been that I have still found myself overwhelmed and uber sensitive.  In fact, in some ways, probably even more sensitive than before.  It was then that I realized:

We can’t find inner peace and be in-tune with ourselves when we are pushing ourselves to ignore everybody else’s energies.

We have to remember to acknowledge and recognize what we have picked up, then take action to help ourselves.

Whether we realize it or not, we are always being affected by the energies of those around us.  You know that cranky customer you dealt with at work the other day?  His crankiness affected you.  You know that lady who started arguing with you in the comments section on an article on the Huffington Post?  She affected your energy.  You know that family member that “dumped” all their problems on you the other day?  They affected your energy.

All of these energies I mentioned above are lower-level energies.  When we allow ourselves to really become attached to that lower-level energy, it can really drag us down.  It can make us stressed, grumpy, cranky and a little less pleasant when you’re standing in line at Starbucks.

On the flip side, there are higher-level energies as well.  Like that customer who gave you an extra big tip or that person on the street who gave you a big smile and genuinely said “I have a great day”.  If we let these energies in, it can lift us up and really brighten our day.  It can make us less stressed, irritated, and worried.

It’s important to check in with yourself every day in every moment and interaction in order to notice if the energy is lifting you up or dragging you down.  If it’s lifting you up, then fan-freaking-tastic!  However, if you notice that it’s dragging you down then it’s time to take some action to protect yourself.

The following are a few things that you can do to help protect yourself from other people’s low-energies:

Make the effort to be around more positive people.

Are you constantly around people that complain about life all the time?  Are you constantly around people who are aggravated, worried, or stressed out about something?  If so, then you may want to create a little bit of distance in order to take care of yourself and give yourself some time to replenish yourself with higher energy.  You may also want to reach out to new people or groups that are generally more uplifting and inspirational.  People that energize you and bring fun and joy into your life.

That being said, another thing to consider is the TV, movies, and music that you are watching.  Does anything that you watch or listen to feel a bit harsh?  Does it feel like it drains you rather than energizes you?  If it does, then you may want to stop watching to these shows or listening to that music.  I know for me, certain hip-hop and rap is definitely on my big “no-no” list, along with horror films (at this point) and even a number of action films.

Also ask yourself how online or smartphone games or activities affect you.  Personally, I even find myself being drained when playing games on my phone at times.  I definitely can’t do any Candy Crush or Words with Friends for any long period of time without it draining me.

Take time every day to connect to your inner power.

A wonderful meditation that you can do is to breath while visualizing white light coming down through the top of your head with each inhale and then exhaling out through your heart.  As you breath, the white light begins to create a bubble of protection around you that expands more and more.

Doing a meditation like this can help us get re-centered and heighten our own energy.  If you feel like you need to really protect yourself from other people’s “stuff”, then you may also want to visualize mirrors being added to the bubble around you.  This way, anything that someone expresses to you get shined right back at them.

Make the conscious effort to focus on the positive.

You can do this through positive affirmations (like saying statements like “I am powerful”, “I have all that I need with me right now” or “I am love”) or by simply just focusing on creating positive thoughts throughout our day.  So whenever a thought of “I don’t have enough money” comes up, exchange it with a thought of gratitude like “I have enough money to have a water supply, clothes and food”.  Looking for all the positive things and focusing on that can help raise our energy so then we are less affected by other people’s lower-energy “stuff”.

Express positivity!

This may be a bit challenging to do at first if you’re stressed out or down in the dumps, but simply just go about your day with the intention to make everyone’s day a bit brighter.  Compliment that lady with the neat necklace at the grocery store.  Smile brightly at the store clerk, ask them how they are doing, and wish them a pleasant day.  Be open to chatting with people in the elevator.  Find and be open to ways to help make everyone else’s day a bit brighter.  It’s really just the little things, but the more you do it, the more you raise your own energy as well as those you cross paths with.

These are just a few tips right now, but the list can just go on and on.  Ultimately remember this: The power of your experience lies with you.  The more you focus on raising your own energy, then the better it will be.  The less you will be affected by other people’s “not so great” stuff and the more you will create and attract more positive things into your life.

PowerOfExperience

Take action to raise your energy right now!

List, at the very least, 10 things that you are grateful for in your life right now.  Truthfully, we should all be able to list thousands but I’ll make it a bit easy for you today. 😉