The other day I was working with a client who was very frustrated because she felt like she wasn’t making a lot of progress in her life.
“There’s all these things that I know I need to do for myself,” she said, “but I just can’t ever get myself to do it.”
What followed were more self-critical statements and an eventual pause with a look of being completely lost along with the question, “What should I do?”
I paused, took a breath, and sat for a moment trying to find the exact right words for this response.
“Why do you have to do anything?” I said. She looked at me a little perplexed.
“We live in a society where we’re hardwired to always be ‘doing’ something,” I continued, “but when it comes to something like this I don’t think the healing comes from doing more. Rather, it’s about being open.”
When we’re stuck in this place where we know we need some kind of growth and healing, we can have a tendency to focus on what we can “do” to “fix” it.
But the reality is that there is no simple step-by-step to do list to help you “fix” your problem. There is no “one size fits all” for everyone all the time.
We’re all unique, so we all have our own individual journey and life path. We just need to be sure to remember this and keep this in mind in order to allow our own unique healing and soul growth to occur.
So what do I mean exactly when I say that we “need to be open”? Well, being open means being open to…
Guidance — from spirit, God, the universe, a higher power, or whatever term you want to use — that will lead us to the right people with the right method at the right time that will be able to help you with your own unique situation.
Our felt experience.
To be open to our own emotions and feelings. When we are sad, upset, or are still holding on to emotional distress from past situation, we have a tendency to repress or dissociate from our experience. It may be too difficult to feel, so we unconsciously seek alternatives to avoid feeling. This can cause us to feel depressed, anxious, etc.
So in order to heal and grow its important to be open to slowly and gradually reconnect to our own feelings. It’s important to allow ourselves to cry, be angry, or whatever. Being open to our felt experience allows us to reconnect consciously with our own natural flow of emotions and feelings.
The un-doing of our old habits.
We may not be consciously aware of what old habits and ways of being in the world are no longer serving us, but by being open to the un-doing of our habits makes change possible.
Ultimately, it’s about allowing yourself to be open to change — in whatever way that comes for you — and trusting that what emerges is meant to come up.
It’s not about trying to control or manipulate the process in some way with your mind (as our ego tends to). Instead, its about surrendering our desires to control and allowing the process to unfold naturally for us.
There are two tools that could really assist you in being open, which include…
Prayer or setting an intention at the start of you day is a very simple way to help you live with an “open to change” mindset. The prayer can be something really simple like, “Spirit, of the highest truth and compassion, I release all of my concerns about _______ to you. I am open to your guidance and intervention. Please guide me in this process. Thank you.”
In any prayer or intention that you want to make, I encourage you to create the wording for yourself because then it will be much more impactful.
In meditation, we minimize the power of our ego or fear-based mind and connect to our true selves, which is pure love.
If you already have some meditations that you really enjoy, then I encourage you to do that. If not, then I am currently giving away for free my “Healing Blocks to Love” meditation from my new album Ignite Love from Within: Meditations for Creating Relationships and a Life Filled with Love.
In this meditation, I guide you to identify at least one fear-based thought that is blocking you from love (which, in relation to the topic we’ve been discussing here, could simply be a thought like “I need to control my healing process”). Then, I guide you through a visualization to release it. If you’re ready to start creating relationships and a life of love, then click here to grab you copy as my gift to you.
Take action now!
Get out a sheet of paper write out a prayer or intention to state at the start of your day to help you live with an “open to change” mindset. Then share it in the comments below!