For the last few weeks or months, I’ve been in a state of writer’s block.
If you’ve been following me regularly for a while now, then you may have sensed this on some level already because it’s pretty unordinary for me to not be coming out with a new blog every week.
Yes, I’ve had the podcast but, admittedly, it’s become a way to help cover up the writer’s block so I could still be bringing you weekly content.
So what’s the cause to the writer’s block, you ask?
It’s no one thing in particular, but many things.
… reflecting on where I’m at and where I want to be.
… letting go of ways of being in the world that are no longer serving me nor anyone.
… releasing old beliefs and ways of perceiving the world and my place in it.
… processing old feelings of loss and grief that still hadn’t been fully processed.
Upon reflection, I can see how I had been focusing so much on doing that I was hardly allowing myself to simply be — and it caught up with me.
A few days ago it hit pretty hard when I found myself extremely stressed thinking about my future — where I want to go, what I want to do and how.
Being a student of A Course in Miracles, I knew intellectually that by simply trusting and allowing things to flow I will be guided exactly to where I’m meant to. But telling myself to trust and shove those feelings of worry away simply didn’t work — and it never does. Instead, it made me more agitated.
So I gave myself time to feel it. I literally spent the entire day stewing in my own feelings of worry, sadness, frustration, and so on.
… and, apparently, that’s all I needed to do, because the next day I found myself calmer and more peaceful. Not relieved because I had found any answers, but simply feeling okay with where things are right now.
It was a matter of really feeling those feelings so that I could get to a place of being okay with just being, rather than to feel guilty for not doing work to move forward.
Yesterday I went to a local farmer’s market and then a grocery store. In my process of shopping I felt drawn to get myself some prosciutto, marinated mozzarella, tomatoes, and basil. A friend of mine had shared this amazing combination of foods with me a few weeks ago when she came back from her trip in Italy.
As I placed them all on my plate and drizzled them with balsamic vinegar for my afternoon snack, the words “Dolce far Niente” came to my mind.
If you’ve ever seen the movie or read the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert then you’ve heard this saying before. In Italian it means: the sweetness of doing nothing.
The Italians in Eat, Pray, Love explained to Liz that Americans need to be told to take a break and relax, but Italians don’t need to be told. If someone were to tell them to take a break, they would say, “Yes I know I deserve a break. I know that I need to take some time to simply just be and enjoy life for what it is.”
Because, really, what is it that we’re really after? A great job? An amazing relationship? A great income?
On the surface it may appear that way, but if we never allow ourselves to simply be and enjoy life’s little moments, then we’re forever going to be unsatisfied. We’re always going to be in the race of chasing unattained wishes and dreams. And, as a result, we’re never actually going to be able to enjoy anything — we would’ve lived a life of stress, rather than joy.
It’s okay to do nothing.
It’s okay to reflect.
It’s okay to enjoy life even if everything isn’t “perfect”.
It’s okay to celebrate even if there is no big event to celebrate.
And it most certainly is okay to spend an entire day feeling anxious, depressed, sad, angry, or whatever.
So wherever you are in your life — whether you’re sad, frustrated, worried, or stressed. Even if you’ve recently gone through a breakup. Even if you’re not sure how you’re going to pay next month’s rent. Even if you think you’re job sucks. Even if you’re stuck in writer’s block. It’s time to stop, slow down, and simply enjoy life.
‘Cause life’s not meant to be lived stressed and chasing unattained dreams — it’s meant to be enjoyed… one present moment at a time.